Bad moments of kitties that hoomins shouldn’t be laughing at....

Well, everybody knows that we, cats, are almost and in every way purrfect (OK, maybe not everybody knows, I know that those stupid dogs don’t have a clue really but they don’t really count so let’s move on...) and we do everything with grace and dignity....I mean look at the way we move, we clean ourselves, we stare at hoomins and the world, we run, we chase…etc, etc. Everything about us is full of mystery and charm...we are the kings and queens of our hoomins’ homes.... and hoomins adore us because of the way we are…But of course there are moments in time when things do not always go according to plan....I mean we do have very very occasional moments when things are not that purrfect after all, but these moments are rare, beyond our control and most definitely not to be laughed at by hoomins....because if we then start laughing at hoomins at their silly and very often stupid mistakes or mishaps they too often are making…well, then and more likely we would never stop laughing at them!

So we except from hoomins a bit more understanding and not to laugh when you know...accidents do happen!
So when and for example in a few occasions let’s day I might miss the kitchen counter by  miscalculating the distance between the floor and the counter I really don’t appreciate the hoomins’ reaction of laughing loud while shouting ‘Ozzy, you are too fat to jump that high anymore....you’d break the unit, ha, ha’....not funny at all. It was a genuine mistake, a miscalculation from my part because of the kitchen not having sufficient light at the time! It had nothing to do with the way I am, not being heavy or out of practice or anything else that silly!  I’m most definitely not fat! We have discussed this before, many times before hoomins....I just look big, that’s all....So next time you’ve tripped over and fall flat on your faces hoomins I’d be there laughing loud myself, even if you can’t hear me as we cats don’t laugh the same way as hoomins...but you can tell by the look in our eyes and how we look at things that we find at certain times rather amusing...or silly and funny!

Also and regarding the little incident with the litter tray the other day, hoomin, you have no evidence so you can’t tell who was responsible for that little accident, it could have been any of us and not just me....Again I’m not that fat and I’m not getting too big for the litter tray, you don’t need to get a bigger one....such a nonsense....That was an unfortunate accident and no one should be blamed for...don’t you hoomins having accidents when you want to use the toilet? I have heard you, quite often, saying that you laughed too much and that you’ve almost had an accident....see? You too hoomins have accidents and we cats don’t blame you or make any fuss about it.....So I would expect the same reaction when there is the occasional accident...you know sometimes you’re miscalculating spaces and you are in a hurry....

See? I’m looking, not judging...where is my dinner hoomins?

As I’ve said we cats are purrfect.  in every way, better than dogs and hoomins and very very rarely can we be accused of unfortunate accidents but sometimes there are some situations when we don’t seem to have totally control....In those occasions we expect from hoomins to be more understanding and less judgemental as we are...we don’t judge you and you make mistakes all the time....Like right now for example, it is well passed my dinner time and my food bowl is still empty...not criticising, see? Waiting patiently for hoomins to move towards the kitchen...because I’m a very understanding and considerate kitty when it comes to hoomins impurrfection!


Purrs and meows till next time!

Not all things are what they seem...at least to a cat that is!

You know sometimes I do get a bit fed up with hoomins and their misconceptions about us, especially of what they believe we like and we might not like....You know hoomins think they are toooooo clever and that they know everything there is about us, like they can read our minds or something….such nonsense...of course hoomins can’t read our minds.....we, cats, on the other hand and although we don’t really have to or even try to, we simply know what hoomins think and what they’d do in every situation, we are what hoomins call...very intelligent creatures (some might even think that and since we are so intelligent why we don’t rule the world and let hoomins do it so badly…well, I say everything in good time, all good things come to those who wait and they are patient…).

Now, a  good example of what I’m trying to say here is when hoomins get us what they often call expensive toy thingies  to play with...You see hoomins seem to think that we don’t really understand the concept of playing with things that they are not real! Of course we know that that fury or plastic thingy that moves on the floor is not a real mouse or what ever else it supposes to be but nevertheless we will still play with it because we like playing like hoomins or other animals often do and of course we don’t have to be a kitten to like playing with moving things...you can play at any age. Playing is fun at any age and for any species, not just hoomins, you don’t have to act like you are on a real hunt, you can still pretend and have fun at the same time without causing any harm to anyone….we kitties know that very well, even if we don’t think like hoomins think or believe that they do….
Because playing is fun and a good exercise to do! So and because we know that we are playing with what is not real prey and we don’t really care that we can’t really catch and kill the prey in the end, we therefore can play with anything that we found entertaining and fun to play....and I mean anything. so hoomins shouldn’t be surprised when I for example like playing with a little square box which I’ve just found abandoned in a dark corner, under the sofa....You see I like playing with it because it is fun, I can throw it in the air, bat at it, kick it and do anything I like....it is my toy after all, isn’t it now hoomins? Because it isn’t round and doesn’t roll it doesn’t mean that I can’t have fun with it....As each of us kitties are unique so are our own playing preferences therefore I like what I like.... I don’t like chasing fake mice or birdies but I like playing with my own stuff (although that red spot is still very irresistible.... to catch and I will soon or later, it won’t escape my claws…). I just like having a bit of fun now and then....On the other hand I don’t think that is fun to chase flies or spiders or even mice and birdies....I think it is cruel to chase creatures that they don’t bother you....that feather though hanging from that string is very interesting....

Yes, this is my new favourite toy....what about it hoomins?

So my playing habits are not really strange but rather unique as I am of course....I mean it is a lot of fun to leave cat litter all over the house on the carpet after you’ve visited the litter tray and then watch the hoomins completely ignorant about it stepping on those small pellets when they are not wearing any shoes and hear them shouting all these bad words!!!
It isn’t cruel but very very funny....hoomins can be very amusing at times, you just have to watch them behave silly.... Besides I like playing cat litter lego, hee hee!

Anyway better go now, hoomin alert in the kitchen....

Purrs and meows till next time!

When hoomins are not well...things are…a bit different!

I must admit my hoomins don’t get what they call ‘ill’ very often....well I think that they are not getting ill...they don’t show any of the obvious signs that is....I mean you can’t really miss it when they are ill because they are becoming unbearable....
You know one morning you wake up normally, you are your happy and cheerful self and you want to pass that cheerfulness to your hoomins of course by trying to wake them up so they can get up and get ready for the new day, you are doing all your normal routines, you know, sitting on their face, biting and licking any available and exposed extremities, knocking things from the table, messing up with the blinds, jumping on the toilet seats in the bathroom to make some noise, scratching at the carpet and furniture, etc, etc...you know normal daily stuff and then you get nothing from the hoomins, well at least the one who usually gets up first and prepares our breakfast! Absolutely nothing, no movement, not a sound not even a glimpse of an open eye....nothing, no reaction whatsoever!

Then of course you start to worry a bit. What’s wrong with hoomin why there is no reaction or any movement is she dead or something (the other hoomin won’t usually move for at least another half hour, he is the lazy one and least likely to go to the kitchen to prepare our breakfast, so there is no much point bothering him in the mornings...of course he has his uses later in the day, especially when it is time for snoozing or getting a bit of attention and playtime....but definitely not in the mornings!).

So for the next half an hour I try in vain to get up the hoomin up and things kinda look despair till of course it is time for the other hoomin to get up. Then you realise that something is not right with first hoomin as the second hoomin gets up and goes to the kitchen (unheard of) to prepare us our breakfast...of course and because he never gets involved with our daily feeding schedule and obviously because he doesn’t want to bother other hoomin, he gets it all wrong and gives us our dinner instead of our breakfast...you should expect that after all this time he would at least know what we usually have for breakfast and what for dinner but again we are talking about hoomins and some are not as clever or intelligent as others.....But of course what can you do, you have to eat after all so you eat what you have on your bowl because you are hungry and you meow a little to complain like Faith does (well she meows about everything anyway) but there isn’t much else that you can do....

So morning goes pretty quickly and other hoomin is still in bed with no much of a sound or movement under the covers....is she still alive, you know I was still wondering worryingly of course. So the second hoomin leaves and the other hoomin is still in bed and the house is very quiet....So and as there is much really to do than having a snooze myself and since hoomin was still in bed I thought that I’d better join her to keep her company and of course to know if and when she was likely to get up and perhaps go into the kitchen for a snack or something (she would had to get up at some pont….).

But of course and although the hoomin didn’t get up as normally as she would do in the morning because quite obviously she wasn’t feeling very well she nevertheless got up later on and checked that we all had been fed and topped  up our bowls (I don’t think she trusted the other hoomin that he had actually fed us....hee hee...I wasn’t going to tell her that he had...she didn’t need to know in her condition) and checked that everything was OK before she went back to bed....

I must admit the whole day was a bit unusual, having the other hoomin doing a lot of the not well hoomins chorus (and not doing them well…you know some hoomins are quite bad at certain things than others…) but and at the same it wasn’t actually that bad as one hoomin stayed at home all day and I had somebody to sleep on the bed and got a lot of attention for being such a loyal and good cat....not bothering hoomin and keeping her company, you know doing a little bit of nothing....

Me getting some well deserved attention from hoomin!

Hmmm, you know now that I’m thinking about it, I’m not sure that it was such a bad experience after all...maybe hoomins not being well and staying at home all day is not a bad thing after all, extra feeding and more attention must be a good thing...
Oh well at least my hoomins are specially nice to me now....they think I’m more loyal than the other two lazy ones....hee hee! That day worked quite well after all, more treats and attention for me!!

Purrs and meows till next time...

Something hasn’t been right at home....

Hello hoomins and other kitties out there, how your week has been so far? Mine hasn’t been that great really I’m afraid….
If you remember last week I was telling you that something wasn’t right with hoomins, they were acting a bit more pecualiar than usual that this....yes I know they are hoomins after all and they are expected to behave strange....but no,  this time they were acting really really strange...even for hoomins!
For starters they were quieter than normal, they didn’t seem to get annoyed with everything I did (not that I do things to annoy my hoomins on purpose of course, but you know sometimes things do happen which things you can’t seem to be always able to control...so let’s call them accidents!). Not only they didn’t seem to be getting annoyed with everything we did (it wasn’t only me but the others too as well) but they were really forgiving and again very very affectionate (nope no anniversaries or birthdays or any weird hoomin holidays this week to explain their soapy state this week either!). Another thing that I found strange as well is that they both seemed to be rather sad and to often talk quietly to each other.....Yeap something hasn’t been right all this week...Hoomins were not behaving like hoomins....

I’m trying to catch that pesky mouse over there....can’t reach it grr!

And there was the other thing as well....you know when you get the feeling that you are forgetting something or somebody….It felt that someone was missing, not being around anymore....Hoomins were really good though at keeping me entertained so I haven’t been bored or anything that it could have explained why I was feeling rather sad myself  but still it felt that there was something else that I should be doing….not with the hoomins!

Faith being Faith was spending all her time in her little house in the hoomin’s office/study room and she usually only comes out when she wants to eat (or wants some attention from the hoomin when she is working) meowing and demanding from the hoomins to have her food ready for her....She is such an impatient cat you know it’s unbelievable! I won’t usually take the hoomins’ side when it comes to us, kitties, but when it comes to Faith you have to feel sorry for the hoomins, they are trying their hardest to please her but she is sooooo demanding....if her food is not ready when she wants it she would walk away and the hoomin then would have to
 go and fetch her back! Such a little drama queen Faith is....because she had a little health scare a while ago hoomins try to always feed her first and to make sure that she is not getting stressed....but of course Faith is totally milking the whole situation and overreacts to get the attention and food she wants from the hoomins. Of course hoomins are very gullible and they’d do their hardest to make sure that she gets what she wants when she wants it....Unbelievable behaviour!
As for Choo Choo, well he plays the I’m too old to do anything card so feed me now hoomins or I’d starve  works as well (or too well) for him too! He only has to meow once or pretend that he has some difficulties with climbing on some high above ground areas and hoomins are again too easily fooled and they’d try again their hardest to keep him happy and stress free...anything that Choo Choo wants Choo gets....poor hoomins so easily deceived! Again despicable behaviour from a cat of any age I say!

So you see myself, I try to be honest with hoomins, I don’t pretend that I can’t do things or that I need help from the hoomins or get annoyed too easily if my food is not on my bowl when I want it....or even meow to be fed and make a fuss if hoomins don’t give me the attention I want when I want it (well I get a lot of attention sometimes which it can be at times a bit too much actually so I’m not that needy when it comes to the attention matter from the hoomins).

Anymeows what I was telling you before I got distracted with those two lazy cats who they are so demanding and deceitful that makes me feel ashamed being a kitty myself and feel sorry for my poor hoomins that they are trying their hardest to please us? Oh yes, that something wasn’t right at home this past week....yes something is definitely not right and something seems to be missing and I still can’t figure out what it is and why hoomins were sad and very forgiving, especially with me....Nope I’m still in the dark…what is missing?

Well I better go now, feel kinda peckish after all this talking and pawtyping but I’d figure it out eventually  and be certain that I’d let you know what is that I can’t figure out yet that is not right...

So purrs and meows till next time!

Anniversaries and other hoomin stranger special occasions...

There have been many times that I have said it…that hoomins are really strange creatures...I mean the things they do sometimes does define logic....but of course they have also their good moments and they can be caring and sometime fun to play with....especially when they least expect it of course...

But then they go and spoil all this fun and good feeling when they do have what they call as special days and when they seem to get over excited like they have been to the litter tray a few times on the day....To be totally honest though this isn’t what really bothers me as
 such...they can be excited and happy as much as they like as long as they are staying out of my way....but of course and in some occasions this is not the case as they get us involved in their silly celebrations (and I don’t particular care too much about the others really as I care about my own involvement in those annoying and silly behaviours shown by these pesky hoomins).

Yes I’m trying to hide from hoomins....well hidden don’t you think?

So last weekend it was as hoomins called ‘my anniversary’...five years to the day that I moved with them and adopted them as my hoomins. I mean five years...wow! How quickly time passes...I was a very skinny, timid and scared kitty then! Look at me now....no no I’m not that fat, don’t take the hoomins side on this...I’m not double the size of what I once was... (to confess you something else as well, something that I don’t really understand is why the last couple of days hoomins are saying that I look like Thor....is that an insult...what is that Thor, is he another pretty cat like me?). Anymeows going back to my anniversary thingi....you know it wouldn’t have been that bad of a day if hoomins stuck to what they do well…you know, provide us with special treats and nice food, nicer than normal and and just leave it to that!
 But no, hoomins have to be hoomins  of course and over react, like kitties who they have just been to the litter tray! I mean why once more have to be so super affectionate and very emotional all day long and spoil all that good mood? I mean and don’t get me wrong I’m very grateful that my hoomins let me adopt them and they then provide me with a good home…
Well I need to be kind I guess as there can always be improvements  that they can be made at home and I have some really good ideas how to make it the purrfect home for all of us....you know more cat orientated than it is now....spread some more boxes around along with some more climbing areas, easier access to where all the food is kept, bigger and more litter trays in many locations in the house so you don’t have to go very far, some more toys perhaps...hmmm…perhaps toys that I can chose for a change…more space on the bed, sofa and chairs and not having to remove the hoomins all the time or to try to keep them in place so they don’t take too much space on the bed....etc. Of course there is also a lot of improvements that they can be made on  the hoomins themselves as well but I don’t want to be over critical really, I’m not ungrateful you know.
But and  as I’ve said it before I don’t mind all these celebrations on the hoomins special days but please let’s have less cuddles, kissing, hugging and most importantly let’s try not to bother me when I’m trying to get some quality quiet time on the bed or sofa...keep it down hoomins when the cat here tries to sleep...
 I know that you like me and I like too hoomins and you are after all my best hoomins but a kitty like myself needs to have some independence and privacy occasionally...

Anymeow at least anniversary day is over for at least another year and now things can go back to normal....although something doesn’t seem to be totally right though....hoomins look rather upset and sad and something seems to be missing....
 

I better go now and perhaps try to figure out what is going on with hoomins...let you know next time…

Purrs and meows till next time

Seriously I'm not a kitten and I do not have an evil twin...despite what hoomins think!

Well, sometimes hoomins say things that most definitely are not true and they hurt my feelings. I mean, all these accusations, blaming me for things I’ve never done just because of the way I am and my unique purrsonality. Because and after all, us, kitties, do have our own unique purrsonalities, which make us very special, don’t you agree hoomins?
 This is why I’m so loveable and unique (of course it does help that I’m very cute as well, it is true after all, I’m very cute and cuddly, my hoomins keep saying all the time, so I’m just being honest here....what do you mean who is modest here....don’t know what that means, sorry!).

Anymeows, what I was saying? Oh yes being blamed and accused for things that are not really my doing after all.  It is bad enough accused of being a bully when quite obviously I’m not as I’m only trying to help the others being a bit more active by doing some needed exercise and checking on them when they are using the litter trays to make sure that they are not making any mess and hoomins get annoyed by having to clean all that mess, etc....that’s not bullying hoomins, that’s being considerate and helpful.

But what I don’t really get is being accused of acting like a kitten and not seem to want to grow to an adult cat....that’s nonsense. I’m not behaving like a kitten by being curious and too playful....or  that there is another me around, that I have an evil twin... That’s silly, how is it possible for me to be at two places at the same time? That’s defy logic, even hoomin one! Besides there is no way that there is another Ozzy out there, I’m unique remember?  I’m just very active for my  and I’m not an Ozzy Button...whatever that means, I’m not changing to a kitten...I’ve always been like this, playful, active and very cute...So what if I like playing and knocking things of tables and shelves....isn’t what a cat suppose to do? After all hoomins are here to serve and clean and tidy up after us....they are not called cat servants for no reason you know....I must admit sometimes I get a bit excited but that’s normal....there are always things to get excited about, like new boxes, or birdies outside or even that fat squirrel who tries to eat the birdies food from the feeders at the window, moths, flies, spiders, red dots moving around, etc, etc…There are always good reasons to get excited, when hoomins get in the morning...breakfast, when they come home in the evening...dinner, when they go to the kitchen...they’d then fill up empty bowls, after you have visited the litter box...don’t you kitties out there let your hoomins know that you have just visited the litter box, it is a very good to get excited of course!                
         

Just helping the hoomins with their chorus, see?

As for being in two places at the same time as I’ve said it before it’s just nonsense, there is no other Ozzy in the house, only myself....I just like to know what’s going on and to keep an eye on hoomins, I mean I need to check that places like the shower and bathroom are safe for them to use, to help them with their house chorus (not vacuuming though…don’t like that noisy thing they use..) and cooking, I’d help them to clean all that mess and inspect that they are doing everything right by of course jumping on the kitchen counters so to be close by....just being considerate and helpful, you see…

Shower is safe to use hoomin...you’re welcome!

So hoomins stop those nasty accusation I’m just being myself, a kind and helpful kitty and you should be glad that you have found me....you could have done a lot worse by adopting another cat who would have cared about nothing (like those other three lazy ones...)

After all I’m not just cute and pretty I’m very helpful and caring, don’t you agree?

Purrs and meows till next time!

                                                                                                                                                    

Eating, sleeping and bullying....not really...well maybe sometimes!

There are three things that hoomins think that I do...rather well all the time...and which things well let’s say they believe that I’m not at my best behaviiour!
Of course that is not true...As everybody knows I’m a well behaved kitty and all these accusations are just stories that my hoomins are making up to destroy my good reputation. To be honest I really don’t know why hoomins are so mean to me sometimes....I thought they like me but then again...they are hoomins after all...not the best species around and at times so unpredictable….

So first of all I would like to emphasise and make very clear that despite any rumours that they might go around at the moment I don’t eat all the time and I’m not fat as hoomins keep saying...Ozzy you need to stop eating...Ozzy you are too fat...pfft...all lies, especially the one that goes around at the moment that apparently I fell into the bin in the kitchen while I was trying to get to some leftover chicken...nonsense...As I’ve said it before it was an accident...I’just slipped and fell into the bin...I wasn’t trying to get inside or anything...why I would like to get inside the smelly bin? I’m a cat after all and not a smelly dog...pfft, really now!

Also I don’t eat all the time or I try to steal the other cats or hoomins food...of course not. I eat my own while and at the same trying to be considerate as well by also trying to save hoomins some money by making sure that no food is getting wasted...if it is being abandoned...and no I do not try to steal their food while they are still eating...what kitty would do such a thing, really now! As for the hoomins dinner I’m just making sure that is safe for them to eat....again not trying to steal it!
And for the million time again....no,  I’m not fat...I simply look big because of all the extra fur I carry over all these cold months...I’m just fluffier than normal that’s all...
So hoomins can you stop circulating all these lies that I’m fat and that I eat too much, all these accusations need to stop right now, please!

As for my sleeping habits...no I don’t snore or push hoomins off the bed while I’m sleeping...I’m only taking a little space on the bed and try to keep out of the hoomins way at night...They must have some kind of nightmare or dreaming about me trying to push them off the bed or biting their hands and feet at night if exposed or snoring...this is not snoring...Don’t you know hoomins the difference between snoring and purring...only us kitties purr and it is unique to each of us....so what you call snoring is actually a very melodic purring....

As for me being a bully....ha! This really tops it up...How dare you say that I’m a bully when I’m clearly trying to keep everybody in tip form as they are all lazy and don’t exercise very much...so I need to make sure that they do a bit of running so to burn some of that excess energy they are accumulating....I’m only being playful and trying to motivate everybody...If I did bully them, then  where is the evidence...no fur or scratches to be seen....Besides them two are simply drama queens who like nothing better than over reacting and to try to get me into trouble by pretending that I’m attacking them....They are the bullies not me, hoomins!

Who’s fat hoomins?

Anymeow now that I’ve said the truth I think I truly deserve a little treat so I think I’d go and check on hoomins to see if they are about to fill up any...my bowl I mean...It is well passed my dinner time after all!

Purrs and meows for now!

Things that we cats like to do....not to annoy hoomins of course...on purpose!

It is true of course that we cats sometimes we do things and behave in certain ways that sometimes...I say sometimes, might annoy hoomins because they might think that we behave in that way on purpose....just to annoy them, which of course is not true...well most of the times anyway! We are simply having a bit of fun!

Just relaxing....the sofa is all mine now hoomin!

Let me give you some examples....let’s talk about the little game of you know I like to sit where you are currently sitting hoomin and I would try my hardest to make you get up, no matter how hard you might try to ignore me....I would be just standing there, starring till you give in and if that doesn’t seem to work then I would try the sudden attack approach, I’d jump on the same seat and I’d use claws to scratch any hoomin part available till the hoomin has had enough
 and gives in and abandons his seat....Then I’d own that seat...for a little while of course, till the hoomin finds another spot to sit, which spot it would be soon also mine as I’d come to claim it soon enough....You see I’ve got bored with the old seat and now I want to sit where the hoomin is sitting again....It’s all a bit of fun although sometimes hoomins seem to get a bit annoyed...they don’t get to the spirit of the game, which really I can’t seem to understand for the life of me. Not fun at all those hoomins sometimes!

Choo Choo plays this game pretty well with the hoomin’s bean bag, he only has to do the starring trick with her, he just stands there and stares and hoomin soon gives up her seat and Choo would claim it (after the hoomin has said a few swearing words, which I would not of course repeat....I don’t think it is appropriate and I don’t approve when hoomins are swearing....such bad manners...in front of us...such a lack of respect...really!) and till Choo Choo gets bored of course, in a little while and decides that the bed is a better option! Such a fun, Choo Choo is the best in annoying the hoomin!

Faith is good at it as well especially with the sofa. What Faith does well is playing to being indecisive card, not deciding in which side of the sofa wants to sit, especially when hoomin is watching TV and then can’t sit down as Faith is keeps changing her mind and moves from one side of the sofa to the other....not a very happy hoomin here but what the heck....it is fun watching them two play music sofas!

My own little preference is the other hoomin’s chair in his office....when he is pretending that he is working I go and steal his chair...he only needs to get up to go the kitchen for a minute to move a bit and then the seat is all mine! Then of course you pretend that you are fast asleep so when hoomin comes back doesn’t want to wake you up...so he decides to sit on the other chair or on the sofa....well of course the fun doesn’t really stop there! Now there is another challenge to steal hoomins new sitting spot and annoy him! Fun times....Again I don’t approve of course of all those swearing words that hoomins would sometimes say....not nice, hoomin must learn not to loose their temper that easy....after all I’m only having a bit of fun!

Another good way to annoy hoomins is of course to constantly insist to be on the other side of a closed door....Kitties that are going outside can play this game by wanting to be indoors when they are outside and wanting to go outside when indoors but for us kitties that don’t like going outside and prefer being indoors all the time there there are always a lot of doors to play with....With me and Choo Choo is mainly the bedroom door.....we’ll constantly scratch at the door and jump on the handle when we are locked outside to get in and of course to be let out when we are inside and the door is closed....The same applies for the bathrooms doors of course...we don’t like it when we can’t see what’s going in there....No hoomins you can’t have your privacy, we need to know what’s going on in there, besides it is after all for you own good as well...we are keeping an eye on you just in case you have an accident or something...so stop complaining.

Anymeows better go now and by the way if hoomins say anything about finding me inside the rubbish bin looking for chicken bones is all a lie...it was just an accident....I don’t know how I fell inside....it is all a blur...a traumatic experience which I would rather forget!

So purrs and meows till next time!

Weekly Tasks...

Today I thought I would talk about my weekly tasks, you know, my responsibilities that I have as a cat carer of the other three cats and the two hoomins in my home so you can see that I’m a very busy pussycat after all! Of course they are always daily tasks which I have to do to keep everybody and everything in order but this is perhaps another days’s discussion. Today we are concentrating on my weekly ones....

Observing hoomins!

So let’s start with Monday...hmm, yes Monday, today is Monday isn’t it? Monday I’m usually wanted in the kitchen where the hoomins are making their own messes with what they call cooking or baking etc...they do like to use a lot of pans and pots and they are always making such a mess, just to eat (why they can’t just open a tin or a sachet of tuna and have a nice meal is beyond my comprehension, they just like making things too do difficult for themselves...tuna flavour is the best of course!). So on Mondays I keep an eye on them in the kitchen of course!

Checking laundry for hoomins!

Tuesdays...let me see…what do we do on Tuesdays? Oh yes, hoomins do what they call laundry on Tuesdays, they wash some of their removable fur coats that they tend to wear some days and then wash it in a spinning machine…weird ha? Again such a waste...why can’t they have one normal fur coat and then just lick it clean like we do... so easy and a lo less fuss! So on Tuesdays I make sure that they put their right dirty fur coats in that spinning machine....need to make sure of course!

Looking for any missing spots!

Wednesdays is another cleaning day...hoomins are so obsessed with cleaning stuff so On Wednesdays they usually clean the house…they insist on removing all of our cat fur from the floor and carpets and they  also are using a very loud kinda scary machine to do so, which I don’t like at all! They are actually making more mess than they are seem to be cleaning but you know they are hoomins after all  and they think they know everything....I don’t get it of course why they have to remove all of our cat hair as it is after all an extra layer of insulation and warmth especially on cold months....Anyways afterwards they have cleaned I have to check everywhere to see that they’ve cleaned thoroughly and they didn’t miss any spots!

Making sure the house is fit to live on of course!

On Thursdays hoomins would clean again…what else would they do? This time is the little cat’s home....poor thing all that hard work that he puts all week to make his home cosy and warm and all of the sudden and while he is about inside his plastic bubble wandering care free in the house...pfft all that hard work gets wasted away and hoomins come and change and clean everything...so  so cruel! Of course we are dealing with hoomins who they can be really mean at times. So and again it’s up to me to check that everything is being done properly and the little cat’s home is as it is supposed to be (eating seeds…such a weird cat!).

Shopping pfft...what hoomins have bought this time?

Then on Friday is shopping day and of course and like any good kitty would do in my place I have to check all the shopping bags that hoomins bring home to make sure they’ve bought the right stuff and enough cat food and treats to last us, as hoomins and as everybody knows they can be forgetful at times. 

Keeping hoomins busy!

Then, we have the weekend, two days when hoomins become very lazy and they need constant reminder of their duties and which also means of course that I need to be more active as hoomins are around a lot (not doing much so I have to) and to also to get sufficient rest especially on Sundays so to charge myself for the coming week!

Sunday rest!

Pfeww! Thar was exhausting...As you can see I’m a very busy kitty and have to do a lot to keep an order in my home as hoomins can be a lot of work!

Anymeow that’s all for now...time for a little snack and snooze!

Purrs and meows till next time!

I am a cat...I think!

You know sometimes hoomins seem to be rather puzzling...I mean they are generally difficult to understand sometimes because of their little peculiarities but and at the same time they can be really really weird....to say at least.
I mean they do behave like normal hoomins, you know they appear to really like you, they feed you, they can be quite affectionate (well, sometimes perhaps too affectionate really...annoyingly hoomin behaviour of course), they do what you want them to do, you know play with you and give you belly rubs and scratch at the right spots....but boy they can be also really strange at times....
I mean the things they would tell about you sometimes, really mean things especially when they say that they like you as well…for example...I know for a fact that I’m a cat...I have four legs, a nice tail, very soft fur (hoomins keep telling me), nice claws which I can use when needed of course, etc, etc...in general I’m a very pretty boy cat, the mirror and hoomins are saying....no doubt there.

What? I’m just checking that is nice and soft for you hoomin...I wasn’t doing any zooping! 

So why on earth then the  hoomins sometimes say that I’m not a cat or at least that I’m not behaving like a cat, I mean this is really hurtful, you know being accused of not being one of my own kind....why? I’m asking you why my hoomins would say such a terrible thing....if I’m not a cat what am I? I’m not a dog for certain (I can’t really bark or like eating dog food....not that I have tried any dog food  to be honest...hmmm, it might not be that bad after all, don’t judge, till you try I always say!). Anyways I’m not a dog and that’s that and I don’t think I’m a hoomin either...no way hoomin, I’m too intelligent and pretty to be a hoomin!
So what else can I be other than what I am....I am a cat, no matter what hoomins are saying...perhaps I can’t meow as the other three do...well I’ve never really got the hang of it...I just can’t really meow that loud like the others...but I most definitely don’t sound like a buzzing mosquito like hoomins keep saying....I simply use my own kind of special meowing...it’s more like brrr...owing than meowing but still it is my own unique meow...as I’m a unique cat...at least we agree on this with hoomins...Besides hoomins do understand what I’m trying to tell them and I’m not loud and annoying like the other two....boy, Faith and Choo Choo can be loud when they want attention and food...on the other hand I’m very considerate with my brrrowing...it is quiet and very discreet, pleasant to the hoomin ears or I purr as loud as Ripley does...hoomins can’t even hear my little purrs...and that’s another of my good points. Also and to make it clear once and for all I do not snore either, this is another false accusation by my hoomins…hoomins, it’s not snoring...it’s another form of purring, again my own unique way of purring!

Another thing that hoomins keep say about me that I don’t do like normal cats is  that I’m not doing zooping like normal cats do but again it is because I have found my own unique style of zooping which I find very relaxing....it works for me just fine...I’m pretty sure that all cats out there zoop their own way...at least I’m doing some cat zooping unlike the other three who don’t even try...or asked to do any zooping…far too lazy those three….and my little paws don’t leave marks on the walls…it’s all lies, I simply like stretching my paws on the wall!

As for liking being with the hoomins all the time and following them around, isn’t what us kitties are supposed to do so to keep an eye on hoomins? I need to know what they are doing just in case they need my assistance and I’m not just being curious all the time...and of course I would sit on the chair as soon as any of the hoomins gets up...what else a kitty is supposed to do when there is an available warm spot to sit on?  After hoomins evacuate the seat it then becomes available to occupy by anyone....what else do they expect from a kitty to do?

Seriously I really can’t see that I’m doing anything that any other normal cat won’t do...You know something, I think hoomins are just jealous because they want to like me, a pretty and clever kitty and of course and because they can’t they want to convince me that I’m not either....oh sneaky hoomins they think they can outsmart a clever kitty like me, ha, don’t think so, silly hoomins….you can never be like me…after all cats do rule the world and hoomins serve them!

Now better go and check on those pesky hoomins...it’s past dinner time you know!

Purrs and meows till next time!

Cat myths that hoomins believe and which are not true....of course

We have established long time ago that hoomins are very gullible and they believe in myths and fairy tales....well they believe everything you tell them that is, even if it isn’t with many words...a few meows would usually do the trick....

So I would like to tell you some truths and hopefully you hoomins who read this would change your minds about us, cats, well at least a little. For starters, you seem to believe that we cats don’t do much other than sleep and eat all day....that’s sooooo not true....we really don’t sleep all the time and we eat very little but frequent of course so to keep our energy, you see. We eat only when we need to and not all the time and when there is food around.....soooo not true!

As for sleeping...come on now, we don’t sleep all day or most of the day, we only sleep when we need to, when we are tired and after we’ve had a good play and hunt or catch....wherever...and we need a rest. Like you do hoomins...You see, myself,  I’m usually awake when my hoomins are around so to keep on eye on them as well as the other three and I would go to bed when hoomins go, at night time and then I would sleep till morning, like my hoomins do! Of course as it is my responsibilty to make sure that hoomins wake up on time to do their chores before they have to go wherever they go when they go outside, so I would get up a bit earlier to encourage and help them get up on time as they often need a little persuassion as hoomins are known to be a little lazy at times...So I would use as per normal a bit of head butting, face licking and biting, sitting on them, knocking things over, attacking exposed feets, etc, etc, you know the usual stuff that cats do to help their hoomins wake up in the mornings.
As for the rest of the day I don’t spend it sleeping when the hoomins are not around as I usually have many things to do, I’m after all a very busy kitty...looking after the other three (we they can be rather lazy at times but then they are getting a bit old so they can be excused), keeping an eye on the birds and pesky squirrels outside and general to what’s going on out there, making sure that all bowls are empty for the hoomins so they can refill them again when they return..making also a bit of a mess with the carpets and sofa covers for hoomins so they can keep themselves busy when they come home, eventually....among other things that a kitty has to do! Of course there are many hours in a day and after all the chores are done I might have a little snooze myself as well so to keep my self fresh for when hoomins return of course....they’d need to be welcomed and followed around till everything is done...you know  till all bowls are full again....
So yes it is a hoomin made myth that cats sleep most of the day and stay awake at night so to annoy their hoomins...seriously who wants to stay awake at night when nothing is going on and hoomins can’t even hear you or give you any attention....not me...I prefer to sleep!

Not sleeping....just resting....I had a rather tiring day...

Another false assumption is that boy cats don’t get along when are living together....this is utterly nonsense as me and Choo Choo are the best of friends and we are getting along just fine...I like Choo Choo he is a lot nicer and friendly than the two girls that they are also around...Don’t get me wrong I like Faith and Ripley but to tell you the truth though girl  cats are really a pain to live with sometimes....they are soooo fussy and unreasonable and like to get you into trouble for no apparent reason....no fun whatsoever! I mean I’m only trying to sniff Faith’s tail....especially the start of her tail and she gets really paranoid and she growls and meows for the hoomins to come to rescue her and so I can get into to trouble....try to touch her or get her involve in some playing and chasing and she meows so loud that hoomins believe that I’m attacking her....as for Ripley, she is the worst,  you only have to get near her and she growls and hisses like she is being attacked and she even pretends that she is in danger by taking the defensive pose so hoomins would think that I’m actually attacking her....Unbelievable! i know she is the oldest and a bit grumpy at times....but this is a premeditate assault on my good reputation, so hoomins think I’m a bully....she is soooo bad!
No, no don’t like girls they are such drama queens....give me Choo Choo any time...he never gets annoyed and he even lets me share his food....So it is not true that boy cats are not getting along, quite the opposite I’d say.

Myself and Choo Choo....my best friend!

Another misconception about us cat is that we are all hunters and that we all like chasing and catching, birdies and miceys and other smaller animals....again that’s not true...my best friend after Choo Choo of course is Grizzly, the hamster cat that lives in that plastic box and which I like watching when he is out and about on his ball.... actually and to be honest with you and don’t tell to anybody else...I kinda find him a bit scary when he rolls in that big ball around the house...he is so fast and looks rather menacing the way he moves around with no fear of anything in his path....Nope I wouldn’t even try and chase him....actually I think that sometimes it seems that he is chasing me instead!
As for the birdies outside....I like them and I think they are really cute and I like watching them when they are coming to the feeders....The only one that I don’t like is that pesky squirrel, he is far too big and fat for the feeders, plus he eats the poor birdies food!

So as you can see there are a lot of misconceptions about us, kitties as there are a lot of things thar we kitties don’t really do....well at least some of us....

Purrs and meows for now...till next time!