Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien

Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien
The misadventures of Ozzy and Tolkien at home

Monday 30 September 2019

It’s really hard work being in charge of a kitten and the hoomins!

Seriously now....not a moment’s peace!

You know, once upon a time I was the youngest of them all, I was the baby in the family and life was very good until and very suddenly, in a very short time, I’ve became the oldest one, the one who is charge of everybody, hoomins and a kitten...I mean I don’t mind the responsibilities involved that much, you know, as you need some one with a bit of intelligence to run things around here these days but having to look after not only my two hoomins but also a very young and rather stupid at times kitten it can be too much even for some one as capable as meowself!

I mean my hoomins are expecting too much from meowself..after all they were the ones that brought Tolkien home and therefore they should be the ones to look after him and not to expect me to to do all the hard work instead....and he is really hard work, believe me!

You know and for one thing he is always there, one minute he is under the hoomin’s feet or close by and the next minute he is on top of me and he wants to play...fighting and he never wants to stop!
Play fighting of course is a very good exercise as you know for everyone especially for us, cats, as you can let out a bit of steam and you can always, well you know put someone in his place when he is too naughty, show him who is the boss around here...Nothing really serious of course like hard biting or fur removing or even scratching....you are careful when playing with another cat/kitten (but no always when playing with hoomins of course…you can be a bit ‘rougher’ in those occasions just to make sure that hoomins know who is in charge of course)....just pretending to fight and doing a lot of rolling around and also making some noises (it’s called energy release hoomins) so to freak out hoomins a bit and to think that we are actually fighting for real....hee, hee! But with Tolkien when playing there is no end to it...you play for a little while, then you stop, having a little rest and a small smack and then you can carry on with the playing if you feel like...but not with Tolkien as when he starts he doesn’t want to stop...for nothing! Not even for a little energy refill, a little snack break! You know it’s not that I’m old or anything but I do like to have little breaks when doing anything that requires some form of energy...it is the natural thing to do but not with Tolkien as he is constantly wants you to play....I even try to hide sometimes but there is no place to hide from him, he always finds you and jumps on you!

And when he doesn’t want to play with me he is then on course to destruction....I mean he is so careless and rough round the edges that whatever he does ends up in disaster...he is a little hurricane our Tolkien (even my hoomins sometimes think that too…we totally agree here)!
I mean he always runs into things because he has no sense of stopping in time before he crushes on surfaces....from one room straight into the cupboards in the kitchen...crash! He never stops on time. Then there is of course the climbing thing...now that he can climb almost anywhere in the house he often finds himself in high places and then he doesn’t know how to get down....he is lucky that hoomins are usually around to rescue him otherwise he would easily have found himself stuck on top of things for hours (hmm not a bad thing perhaps…some precious peace and quiet for a while!).
And of course there is also the chewing of things...I don’t know if this is a kitten thing or teeth issue but he likes chewing everything from cardboard boxes, wires, strings, fingers, toes and my tail and ears...
Yes and by the way what is with Tolkien and my tail...why he likes to play and bite my tail, he has his own, which it is quite long as well, so why this obsession with mine?....ahh kittens....who can understand them? Definitely not me or those silly hoomins who they think they know enough about kittens, if they did they would have managed to control the uncontrollable Tolkien!! Pfff!

Stop playing with my tail....play with your own Tolkien!

Anymeows better go now....it is getting late and it is quiet out there...maybe I can have something to eat without Tolkien playing with my tail this time!

Purrs and meows till next time!

Before I go though I would like to mention once again that my hoomins are trying to raise money to help older cats such like Choo Choo and Faith were with vet bills as their treatments can be very expensive since insurances don’t cover senior cats treatment for life (not fair really as we can live a lot longer now and some of us need medical treatment)...so if you feel generous and you want to help cats like Choo Choo to have a good old age you can donate by clicking here:

Also you can buy some of my own range of products, the Ozzy Superstar range here too:


Monday 23 September 2019

Once upon a time I had peace and quiet at home...then hoomins brought home Tolkien...mistake?

Some peace and relaxation before a storm called Tolkien arrives!
You know it has been now quite a while since Tolkien became an unexpected family member….hmmm... and although I do admit it, he has been somewhat beneficial to my life at home as it was mentioned before...you know when he gets blamed for everything by the hoomins while I get to be praised by them for being such a good boy....he, he if they only knew half the truth....still I’m not so sure about him!

I mean (and although hoomins think he is cute and pretty….well what do they know really?) and as I’ve said it many times before he can be such a hard work to train to behave like a proper cat....Of course and on the other side he is always there when you want to annoy...sorry I meant to play with someone as hoomins are not always available when you want them and he is rather good at chasing and absolutely terrible at hide and seek...you know some times I really despair how stupid he can be...is this common with all kittens? Are all kittens that stupid really? I don’t remember myself being so forgetful and stupid when I was young...but then again I was always the smart one among kittens, big cats and hoomins around of course...But seriously now he is absolute terrible when it comes to hide and seek, especially when it comes to hiding part...he finds the most obvious places and hides some of himself while the rest, mostly legs and tail are out there sticking out for anyone to find...Does he call that hiding? Obviously he hasn’t learned by the master yet (meowself of course) how to hide when playing or when trying to hide from the hoomins....
He is also terrible in copying me...I mean it is quite nice that a young kitten copies everything that I do but it would have been at  lot better if he actually copied what I do correctly....I mean and you probably know by now that my little pastime is spending some quality time in the kitchen sink trying to catch those pesky drops that fall down from the tap, which of course needs quite a bit training and patience so to learn the skill and to avoid getting wet...well, I don’t think that Tolkien has picked that skill quite yet...I mean you are supposed to use the taps in the sinks and not to actually follow the hoomins in the shower while they are having their shower in an attempt to catch the waterfall that comes from the shower head as you are more likely going to get a bit wet, to say at least. He shouldn’t also attempt to catch the water when the hoomins are flashing their own watery litter tray as it is also more likely that you might end up in the toilet yourself (unless of course you are quite lucky and the hoomin catches you before you fall in....). 
No purrsonal space! Tolkien doesn’t seem to understand the concept of space it seems!
So yes I don’t think that Tolkien is very good at copying me (or that he understands that water makes you very wet at times) and even at times he even overdoes it as well especially when he becomes almost attached to you especially at times when you try to get some quality snoozing time....he doesn’t really have to sleep next to me or on top of me....I need some breathing space especially when sleeping...and there is plenty of room on the bed or the sofa for both of us!

The other bad thing with Tolkien at the moment is that he is not only forgetful but also that he gets easily distracted....you know, one minute he follows you around and plays with you and the next he forgets all about you and starts playing with one of those toys that hoomins have brought home sometime in the past for meowself and which toys I think at some point in time I got bored with...and now Tolkien finds them interesting to play with....even more interesting than he finds me it seems....if that is possible of course!

But out of all these bad so far learned habits and behaviours there is one good thing about Tolkien especially when he is being so forgetful and so easily distracted.....as at times he even forgets to eat and then he’ll abandon his food rather quickly for something that he might have just seen or heard moving which of course means that then I can help him to finish that abandoned food before it gets wasted!

But I guess I should stop now, after all I have a kitten to look after and as it is his dinner time as well I need to go and keep an eye on him....just in case he forgets again and abandons his food…we don’t want to waste all that food, do we now?

Purrs and meows till next time!

Before I go though I would like to mention once again that my hoomins are trying to raise money to help older cats such like Choo Choo was with vet bills as their treatments can be very expensive since insurances don’t cover senior cats treatment for life (not fair really as we can live a lot longer now and some of us need medical treatment)...so if you feel generous and you want to help cats like Choo Choo to have a good old age you can donate by clicking here:

Also you can buy some of my own range of products, the Ozzy Superstar range here too:





Monday 16 September 2019

Kittens can be worse than hoomins...sometimes

Oh away from Tolkien at last...he is not behind me, is he?

You know and this is a rare occasion I think that I agree with hoomins on this...I’ve decided, I’m too old to be chasing after Tolkien...he is such hard work sometimes and I really hate to say this but I think that hoomins weren’t that wrong after all when they were kept saying the same thing, over and over again (not of course that I was any trouble at any time and I’m also pretty sure that they weren’t actually referring to me of course...). But actually it is really hard work being a kitten guardian whether you are a hoomin or a grown up cat who knows all, like myself. He is so playful and gets excited so easily and so often about everything that he sees or hears, his tail, flies, hoomins feet, my tail, cat litter on the floor, the floor, the carpet, the list goes on and on….

I mean I’m trying my hardest to keep him busy and entertained, after all he is a good kitten but this running and chasing is a constant and non stop business, which no cat (or hoomin for that matter) can cope with 7 days a week (at least he sleeps at night!).  Where on cat’s world does he get all that energy from? It can’t just be what he eats....I have tried it (you know out of curiosity of course and to also make sure that it is alright for Tolkien, not that I like kitten food or something....do not pay attention to what my hoomins are saying, they are always exaggerating things, anymeows!)

Tolkien playing again with...the blind!!
I don’t think, you know, that I was so energetic when I was young, some time ago, myself (hey, stop that, I’m not that old, I’m still quite fit for my age, not fat just a bit full in certain body areas and that it is because of my thick fur of course). But with Tolkien I don’t get a minute’s peace and quiet, even when he is eating...he doesn’t really eat he just quickly nibbles and then he is ready to play again....with my tail! I mean you need to take some time to enjoy your food and then of course to have your cat nap as the name says..but not with Tolkien....he is always on the move even when he eats or using the litter tray....he, he that’s quite funny actually as he still hasn’t learnt how to use the litter tray properly, the art of covering....correctly, you know when you do use the litter and not the litter tray to cover....Silly kitten, still very young and rather stupid, worse than my hoomins at times it seems!

So this last weekend once again instead of relaxing and getting a bit of pampering as it was pamper your cat day I’ve spent most of it instead trying to catch up with Tolkien or I was chased by him and provoked to fighting…and you know what and after all this chasing and playing I think I’ve lost quite a lot of weight as well and if this running around the house, chasing and play fighting business continues I’d soon be a very very skinny cat....I don’t think I’d look good skinny though....(I think it is about time for the hoomins to double my daily food portions just in case…they won’t want me to look skinny now!).

But of course I blame hoomins for all these troubles I am having and which troubles they are still putting me through....not so much for bringing Tolkien home (well, he is not that bad all the time after all) but for remembering and rediscovering old cat toys and then bringing them out for Tolkien to play...he gets all interested in them and then he makes me get interested too...as I have to keep on eye on him after all!

So yes, I don’t seem to be getting a lot of peace and quiet these days as it seems that I’m always on the move and being chased by Tolkien (and I don’t chase him myself either or provoking him in any way into fighting...it’s all Tolkien’s fault....he is too playful....it’s not me) while at the same time he also keeps stealing my snoozing spots too!
So I think that is about time that hoomins take some responsibility for Tolkien’s actions too and to also stop expecting me to be doing all the hard work myself! They should try to keep him entertained as well and not to also try to get me involved. with their silly toys...well maybe not all of them! Tolkien is their responsibility and they should spend their precious free time chasing him around the house. I’m having a break now and I’m expecting to find some food on my bowl as I’m well deserving a good meal and a long rest....for a while! I’m too old for this day and night chasing...and I don’t expect to find Tolkien pretending to be snoozing on my sofa!

So I’m off for some snacking and snoozing now

Till next time...
Purrs and meows from myself and pesky Tolkien!

Before I go though I would like to mention once again that my hoomins are trying to raise money to help older cats such like Choo Choo was with vet bills as their treatments can be very expensive since insurances don’t cover senior cats treatment for life (not fair really as we can live a lot longer now and some of us need medical treatment)...so if you feel generous and you want to help cats like Choo Choo to have a good old age you can donate by clicking here:

Also you can buy some of my own range of products, the Ozzy Superstar range here too:




Monday 9 September 2019

A kitten named Tolkien...not bad for a kitten after all!

I’m keeping an eye for Tolkien....he is not stealing this spot, it’s  mine!
Well, yes I know I have been moaning and complaining a lot recently especially about the hoomins  and their silly decision to adopt a kitten and more or less bring chaos to our peaceful lives but I must admit that living with a kitten is not that bad after all! Actually it has been if anything rather beneficial to myself and hoomins of course!

So yes, it wasn’t the worst decision my hoomins have ever made after all. You know, and after all, both my hoomins are getting a bit too old for me, not always available when you want them to be, especially when it comes to playing times...they are getting easily tired and they are a bit slow for my liking so a new and fresh blood it seems it was what I really needed. Besides and let’s face it kittens aren’t that smart after all, they are a lot of things that they don’t know and they can be easily influenced....trained of course so they can grow to be better cats (like myself…).
Yes I do admit Tolkien has been a good thing to have around especially at times when I need my exercise and play time....you know I’ve used to play and do my little running around the house and hoomins used to accuse me for being a destructive force....well guess who they are blaming now for all the mess and destruction our little play sessions might occasionally involves....yeap, it’s the kitten’s fault of course! He is making me, you see, to chase him around the house and all these knocked over objects and turned around carpets in our paths are entirely his doing....he is playing too rough, I keep telling him! But of course and because he is still quite young and cute hoomins don’t seem to get annoyed with him that much and naturally they don’t get annoyed with me at all...win, win situation here. We can run and knock over anything that is in our pathways and hoomins won’t complain...a lot that is...It’s always.... oh it’s a kitten, it is to be expected, he can’t help himself! Now that I’m thinking about it though I don’t think that is that fair, that Tolkien is getting away with almost anything because he is still young and very clumsy and careless and I wasn’t (well not all the time that is)... but at least now I don’t get blamed for all that mess anymore because hoomins believe that is all the kitten’s fault. Things they can’t see they don’t harm me, he he!

Here he is on top of MY BOX, unbelievable!
But there are still a few things though that Tolkien has now learned to do and which things I don’t actually approve or I have given him permission to do so such as stealing my favourite sleeping spots in the house, like the hoomin’s chair, my hammock on the scratching post (OK, I might not quite totally fit there any more, as it seems to have shrunk a bit and I can’t really fit in any known cat position but this is besides the point of being taken over by Tolkien without my permission), on top of my boxes and today the worst one as yet. I’ve just seen him jumping on the kitchen tops for the first time and sniffing around on my favourite spots. This is really unacceptable,,,,he has not given permission to do so by me or he was told that he can go there....I mean where does this privacy intrusion end? Climbing on top of the fridge next or even worse going to the sink and trying to steal my drops from the sink? No, no this is not acceptable at all. The kitten has to learn about boundaries in this house and to respect my spaces or else he would be in a lot of trouble....he will soon know then who is the cat in charge around here....Hmmm!

Anymeows better go know, need to check if he is awake for his night lesson....and my evening play session of course!

Purrs and meows till next time!

Before I go though I would like to mention once again that my hoomins are trying to raise money to help older cats such like Choo Choo was with vet bills as their treatments can be very expensive since insurances don’t cover senior cats treatment for life (not fair really as we can live a lot longer now and some of us need medical treatment)...so if you feel generous and you want to help cats like Choo Choo to have a good old age you can donate by clicking here:

Also you can buy some of my own range of products, the Ozzy Superstar range here too:

Monday 2 September 2019

Kittens are such hard work...why my hoomins don’t ever listen to me!

Finally having some quality time with my hoomin and no kitten around....he is bothering the other hoomin, he he!
Well, Tolkien is being with us now for three whole weeks and boy, have these three weeks gone really slow and being really soooo tiring....everybody is really exhausted trying to catch up with the antics of the little one (both hoomins and meowself, except of course Faith who still pretends that she can’t see him, even when he is in front of her or trying to catch her tail...I really don’t know how she does it, how can she manages to totally ignore him...like he’s not there or he is invisible or something....unbelievable!).
Anymeows and don’t get me wrong I really like Tolkien, he is really fun to have around and bully...I meant play with as he loves playing but he can be really hard work at times. I mean because he is very young he doesn’t seem to understand the concept of having a rest now and then....you know to do what cats suppose to do,  have little naps so till dinner time, save some energy for later when hoomins are around...Well, he hardly seems to get tired! Where does he get all that energy and constantly chasing something, myself, his tail, a toy that he’s just found again, the flies....or yes those flies...There some flies that seem to have taken residency at our home right now and they seem very reluctant to leave despite all hoomins efforts to let them out or catch them (he, he that’s a sight, hoomins trying to catch flies...so funny, watching them trying!) so they have become now Tolkien’s favourite game...well and again he is trying to show how good a hunter he is...(you know how things are with the youngsters these days...they try to impress you, you know the I can do what you can do better attitude....not that I can or want to catch flies...what on earth for...they don’t taste very nice and they are far too fast to even attempt to catch...I let hoomins do all the hard work...The same of course applies for spiders...which thank God for little mercies Tolkien hasn’t discovered yet....after all what hoomins are here for?).

So yes, Tolkien likes chasing flies and he would jump everywhere and as high as he can in his attempt to catch them...which can be fun for 10 minutes watching him but then it becomes boring and dangerous as he often would jump without realising where he would end up landing, on a resting kitten perhaps...or when he is trying to catch the fly on the TV screen....Yeahh hoomins not so happy with Tolkien on those occasions and of course Tolkien being a kitten he totally ignores everybody and he ends up making a lot of a mess....One of these days hoomins will get really annoyed and being cute won’t work for him anymore...I have tried to warn him but again he is a kitten and he doensn’t listen or seems to care about anything...at least my consciousness is clear on the matter!

Tolkien having a little mad catnip time...one of many!
Of course and I must admit it,  it is rather nice having that little character trying to copy you and following you around and of course occasionally and when hoomins are not not watching or they are not around showing him who is the boss around here, you know I let him feel my paw on his head, gently and occasionally of course, so to keep him in his place, you know, as part of his training...it is after all my responsibility to train him, is not?
But you know and now that I am a famous cat after all,  being pet of the week and stuff recenly, I expect a bit more respect, especially from the little one (and hoomins of course...but hoomins are a totally different story and they need special treatment so to be reminded of how special I am of course)....What I don’t expect is not to have any privacy at all, especially at those special times when you want to be left alone to use the litter tray, for example…It is very unnerving, you know, having the kitten watching you while you are on the litter tray....and I know hoomins call it learning how to properly use the litter tray I, myself,  call it invasion of my privacy, my freedom....there are limits and the kitten needs to know when and where he needs to stop watching me....Of course and luckily for me there are plenty of litter boxes in our home so I can escape from Tolkien when he is not watching me and some of them are ever covered so at least I can get some privacy! But I’m telling you sometimes he is such a hard work trying to make him understand the rules around here....and being young is not the best excuse! He needs to start learning and hoomins to also take some responsibilty for his actions...I can’t be his mentor all the time. This cat here needs his purrsonal space and time to enjoy some quality nap time. So hoomins you’ve brought him home you then train him...So there!

Anymeows better go now...it’s almost dinner time and perhaps time for a little play session....where is that kitten gone now?

Purrs and meows till next time!

Before I go though I would like to mention once again that my hoomins are trying to raise money to help older cats such like Choo Choo was with vet bills as their treatments can be very expensive since insurances don’t cover senior cats treatment for life (not fair really as we can live a lot longer now and some of us need medical treatment)...so if you feel generous and you want to help cats like Choo Choo to have a good old age you can donate by clicking here:

Also you can buy some of my own range of products, the  Ozzy Superstar range here too:



Finally this year is over….so let’s all hoomins and cats have a great New Year!

  You can read Ozzy’s comic  ‘Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien’  which is available to download or buy on Amazon Well finally the last day of a...