Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien

Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien
The misadventures of Ozzy and Tolkien at home

Monday, 29 April 2019

Anniversaries and other hoomin stranger special occasions...

There have been many times that I have said it…that hoomins are really strange creatures...I mean the things they do sometimes does define logic....but of course they have also their good moments and they can be caring and sometime fun to play with....especially when they least expect it of course...

But then they go and spoil all this fun and good feeling when they do have what they call as special days and when they seem to get over excited like they have been to the litter tray a few times on the day....To be totally honest though this isn’t what really bothers me as
 such...they can be excited and happy as much as they like as long as they are staying out of my way....but of course and in some occasions this is not the case as they get us involved in their silly celebrations (and I don’t particular care too much about the others really as I care about my own involvement in those annoying and silly behaviours shown by these pesky hoomins).

Yes I’m trying to hide from hoomins....well hidden don’t you think?

So last weekend it was as hoomins called ‘my anniversary’...five years to the day that I moved with them and adopted them as my hoomins. I mean five! How quickly time passes...I was a very skinny, timid and scared kitty then! Look at me no I’m not that fat, don’t take the hoomins side on this...I’m not double the size of what I once was... (to confess you something else as well, something that I don’t really understand is why the last couple of days hoomins are saying that I look like that an insult...what is that Thor, is he another pretty cat like me?). Anymeows going back to my anniversary know it wouldn’t have been that bad of a day if hoomins stuck to what they do well…you know, provide us with special treats and nice food, nicer than normal and and just leave it to that!
 But no, hoomins have to be hoomins  of course and over react, like kitties who they have just been to the litter tray! I mean why once more have to be so super affectionate and very emotional all day long and spoil all that good mood? I mean and don’t get me wrong I’m very grateful that my hoomins let me adopt them and they then provide me with a good home…
Well I need to be kind I guess as there can always be improvements  that they can be made at home and I have some really good ideas how to make it the purrfect home for all of know more cat orientated than it is now....spread some more boxes around along with some more climbing areas, easier access to where all the food is kept, bigger and more litter trays in many locations in the house so you don’t have to go very far, some more toys perhaps...hmmm…perhaps toys that I can chose for a change…more space on the bed, sofa and chairs and not having to remove the hoomins all the time or to try to keep them in place so they don’t take too much space on the bed....etc. Of course there is also a lot of improvements that they can be made on  the hoomins themselves as well but I don’t want to be over critical really, I’m not ungrateful you know.
But and  as I’ve said it before I don’t mind all these celebrations on the hoomins special days but please let’s have less cuddles, kissing, hugging and most importantly let’s try not to bother me when I’m trying to get some quality quiet time on the bed or sofa...keep it down hoomins when the cat here tries to sleep...
 I know that you like me and I like too hoomins and you are after all my best hoomins but a kitty like myself needs to have some independence and privacy occasionally...

Anymeow at least anniversary day is over for at least another year and now things can go back to normal....although something doesn’t seem to be totally right though....hoomins look rather upset and sad and something seems to be missing....

I better go now and perhaps try to figure out what is going on with hoomins...let you know next time…

Purrs and meows till next time

Monday, 22 April 2019

Seriously I'm not a kitten and I do not have an evil twin...despite what hoomins think!

Well, sometimes hoomins say things that most definitely are not true and they hurt my feelings. I mean, all these accusations, blaming me for things I’ve never done just because of the way I am and my unique purrsonality. Because and after all, us, kitties, do have our own unique purrsonalities, which make us very special, don’t you agree hoomins?
 This is why I’m so loveable and unique (of course it does help that I’m very cute as well, it is true after all, I’m very cute and cuddly, my hoomins keep saying all the time, so I’m just being honest here....what do you mean who is modest here....don’t know what that means, sorry!).

Anymeows, what I was saying? Oh yes being blamed and accused for things that are not really my doing after all.  It is bad enough accused of being a bully when quite obviously I’m not as I’m only trying to help the others being a bit more active by doing some needed exercise and checking on them when they are using the litter trays to make sure that they are not making any mess and hoomins get annoyed by having to clean all that mess, etc....that’s not bullying hoomins, that’s being considerate and helpful.

But what I don’t really get is being accused of acting like a kitten and not seem to want to grow to an adult cat....that’s nonsense. I’m not behaving like a kitten by being curious and too playful....or  that there is another me around, that I have an evil twin... That’s silly, how is it possible for me to be at two places at the same time? That’s defy logic, even hoomin one! Besides there is no way that there is another Ozzy out there, I’m unique remember?  I’m just very active for my  and I’m not an Ozzy Button...whatever that means, I’m not changing to a kitten...I’ve always been like this, playful, active and very cute...So what if I like playing and knocking things of tables and shelves....isn’t what a cat suppose to do? After all hoomins are here to serve and clean and tidy up after us....they are not called cat servants for no reason you know....I must admit sometimes I get a bit excited but that’s normal....there are always things to get excited about, like new boxes, or birdies outside or even that fat squirrel who tries to eat the birdies food from the feeders at the window, moths, flies, spiders, red dots moving around, etc, etc…There are always good reasons to get excited, when hoomins get in the morning...breakfast, when they come home in the evening...dinner, when they go to the kitchen...they’d then fill up empty bowls, after you have visited the litter box...don’t you kitties out there let your hoomins know that you have just visited the litter box, it is a very good to get excited of course!                
Just helping the hoomins with their chorus, see?

As for being in two places at the same time as I’ve said it before it’s just nonsense, there is no other Ozzy in the house, only myself....I just like to know what’s going on and to keep an eye on hoomins, I mean I need to check that places like the shower and bathroom are safe for them to use, to help them with their house chorus (not vacuuming though…don’t like that noisy thing they use..) and cooking, I’d help them to clean all that mess and inspect that they are doing everything right by of course jumping on the kitchen counters so to be close by....just being considerate and helpful, you see…
Shower is safe to use’re welcome!
So hoomins stop those nasty accusation I’m just being myself, a kind and helpful kitty and you should be glad that you have found could have done a lot worse by adopting another cat who would have cared about nothing (like those other three lazy ones...)

After all I’m not just cute and pretty I’m very helpful and caring, don’t you agree?

Purrs and meows till next time!

Monday, 15 April 2019

Eating, sleeping and bullying....not really...well maybe sometimes!

There are three things that hoomins think that I do...rather well all the time...and which things well let’s say they believe that I’m not at my best behaviiour!
Of course that is not true...As everybody knows I’m a well behaved kitty and all these accusations are just stories that my hoomins are making up to destroy my good reputation. To be honest I really don’t know why hoomins are so mean to me sometimes....I thought they like me but then again...they are hoomins after all...not the best species around and at times so unpredictable….

So first of all I would like to emphasise and make very clear that despite any rumours that they might go around at the moment I don’t eat all the time and I’m not fat as hoomins keep saying...Ozzy you need to stop eating...Ozzy you are too fat...pfft...all lies, especially the one that goes around at the moment that apparently I fell into the bin in the kitchen while I was trying to get to some leftover chicken...nonsense...As I’ve said it before it was an accident...I’just slipped and fell into the bin...I wasn’t trying to get inside or anything...why I would like to get inside the smelly bin? I’m a cat after all and not a smelly dog...pfft, really now!

Also I don’t eat all the time or I try to steal the other cats or hoomins food...of course not. I eat my own while and at the same trying to be considerate as well by also trying to save hoomins some money by making sure that no food is getting wasted...if it is being abandoned...and no I do not try to steal their food while they are still eating...what kitty would do such a thing, really now! As for the hoomins dinner I’m just making sure that is safe for them to eat....again not trying to steal it!
And for the million time,  I’m not fat...I simply look big because of all the extra fur I carry over all these cold months...I’m just fluffier than normal that’s all...
So hoomins can you stop circulating all these lies that I’m fat and that I eat too much, all these accusations need to stop right now, please!

As for my sleeping I don’t snore or push hoomins off the bed while I’m sleeping...I’m only taking a little space on the bed and try to keep out of the hoomins way at night...They must have some kind of nightmare or dreaming about me trying to push them off the bed or biting their hands and feet at night if exposed or snoring...this is not snoring...Don’t you know hoomins the difference between snoring and purring...only us kitties purr and it is unique to each of what you call snoring is actually a very melodic purring....

As for me being a bully....ha! This really tops it up...How dare you say that I’m a bully when I’m clearly trying to keep everybody in tip form as they are all lazy and don’t exercise very I need to make sure that they do a bit of running so to burn some of that excess energy they are accumulating....I’m only being playful and trying to motivate everybody...If I did bully them, then  where is the fur or scratches to be seen....Besides them two are simply drama queens who like nothing better than over reacting and to try to get me into trouble by pretending that I’m attacking them....They are the bullies not me, hoomins!
Who’s fat hoomins?
Anymeow now that I’ve said the truth I think I truly deserve a little treat so I think I’d go and check on hoomins to see if they are about to fill up bowl I mean...It is well passed my dinner time after all!

Purrs and meows for now!

Monday, 8 April 2019

Things that we cats like to do....not to annoy hoomins of course...on purpose!

It is true of course that we cats sometimes we do things and behave in certain ways that sometimes...I say sometimes, might annoy hoomins because they might think that we behave in that way on purpose....just to annoy them, which of course is not true...well most of the times anyway! We are simply having a bit of fun!

Just relaxing....the sofa is all mine now hoomin!

Let me give you some examples....let’s talk about the little game of you know I like to sit where you are currently sitting hoomin and I would try my hardest to make you get up, no matter how hard you might try to ignore me....I would be just standing there, starring till you give in and if that doesn’t seem to work then I would try the sudden attack approach, I’d jump on the same seat and I’d use claws to scratch any hoomin part available till the hoomin has had enough
 and gives in and abandons his seat....Then I’d own that seat...for a little while of course, till the hoomin finds another spot to sit, which spot it would be soon also mine as I’d come to claim it soon enough....You see I’ve got bored with the old seat and now I want to sit where the hoomin is sitting again....It’s all a bit of fun although sometimes hoomins seem to get a bit annoyed...they don’t get to the spirit of the game, which really I can’t seem to understand for the life of me. Not fun at all those hoomins sometimes!

Choo Choo plays this game pretty well with the hoomin’s bean bag, he only has to do the starring trick with her, he just stands there and stares and hoomin soon gives up her seat and Choo would claim it (after the hoomin has said a few swearing words, which I would not of course repeat....I don’t think it is appropriate and I don’t approve when hoomins are swearing....such bad front of us...such a lack of respect...really!) and till Choo Choo gets bored of course, in a little while and decides that the bed is a better option! Such a fun, Choo Choo is the best in annoying the hoomin!

Faith is good at it as well especially with the sofa. What Faith does well is playing to being indecisive card, not deciding in which side of the sofa wants to sit, especially when hoomin is watching TV and then can’t sit down as Faith is keeps changing her mind and moves from one side of the sofa to the other....not a very happy hoomin here but what the is fun watching them two play music sofas!

My own little preference is the other hoomin’s chair in his office....when he is pretending that he is working I go and steal his chair...he only needs to get up to go the kitchen for a minute to move a bit and then the seat is all mine! Then of course you pretend that you are fast asleep so when hoomin comes back doesn’t want to wake you he decides to sit on the other chair or on the sofa....well of course the fun doesn’t really stop there! Now there is another challenge to steal hoomins new sitting spot and annoy him! Fun times....Again I don’t approve of course of all those swearing words that hoomins would sometimes say....not nice, hoomin must learn not to loose their temper that easy....after all I’m only having a bit of fun!

Another good way to annoy hoomins is of course to constantly insist to be on the other side of a closed door....Kitties that are going outside can play this game by wanting to be indoors when they are outside and wanting to go outside when indoors but for us kitties that don’t like going outside and prefer being indoors all the time there there are always a lot of doors to play with....With me and Choo Choo is mainly the bedroom door.....we’ll constantly scratch at the door and jump on the handle when we are locked outside to get in and of course to be let out when we are inside and the door is closed....The same applies for the bathrooms doors of course...we don’t like it when we can’t see what’s going in there....No hoomins you can’t have your privacy, we need to know what’s going on in there, besides it is after all for you own good as well...we are keeping an eye on you just in case you have an accident or stop complaining.

Anymeows better go now and by the way if hoomins say anything about finding me inside the rubbish bin looking for chicken bones is all a was just an accident....I don’t know how I fell is all a blur...a traumatic experience which I would rather forget!

So purrs and meows till next time!

Monday, 1 April 2019

Weekly Tasks...

Today I thought I would talk about my weekly tasks, you know, my responsibilities that I have as a cat carer of the other three cats and the two hoomins in my home so you can see that I’m a very busy pussycat after all! Of course they are always daily tasks which I have to do to keep everybody and everything in order but this is perhaps another days’s discussion. Today we are concentrating on my weekly ones....
Observing hoomins!

So let’s start with Monday...hmm, yes Monday, today is Monday isn’t it? Monday I’m usually wanted in the kitchen where the hoomins are making their own messes with what they call cooking or baking etc...they do like to use a lot of pans and pots and they are always making such a mess, just to eat (why they can’t just open a tin or a sachet of tuna and have a nice meal is beyond my comprehension, they just like making things too do difficult for themselves...tuna flavour is the best of course!). So on Mondays I keep an eye on them in the kitchen of course!
Checking laundry for hoomins!

Tuesdays...let me see…what do we do on Tuesdays? Oh yes, hoomins do what they call laundry on Tuesdays, they wash some of their removable fur coats that they tend to wear some days and then wash it in a spinning machine…weird ha? Again such a waste...why can’t they have one normal fur coat and then just lick it clean like we do... so easy and a lo less fuss! So on Tuesdays I make sure that they put their right dirty fur coats in that spinning machine....need to make sure of course!
Looking for any missing spots!

Wednesdays is another cleaning day...hoomins are so obsessed with cleaning stuff so On Wednesdays they usually clean the house…they insist on removing all of our cat fur from the floor and carpets and they  also are using a very loud kinda scary machine to do so, which I don’t like at all! They are actually making more mess than they are seem to be cleaning but you know they are hoomins after all  and they think they know everything....I don’t get it of course why they have to remove all of our cat hair as it is after all an extra layer of insulation and warmth especially on cold months....Anyways afterwards they have cleaned I have to check everywhere to see that they’ve cleaned thoroughly and they didn’t miss any spots!
Making sure the house is fit to live on of course!
On Thursdays hoomins would clean again…what else would they do? This time is the little cat’s home....poor thing all that hard work that he puts all week to make his home cosy and warm and all of the sudden and while he is about inside his plastic bubble wandering care free in the house...pfft all that hard work gets wasted away and hoomins come and change and clean  so cruel! Of course we are dealing with hoomins who they can be really mean at times. So and again it’s up to me to check that everything is being done properly and the little cat’s home is as it is supposed to be (eating seeds…such a weird cat!).
Shopping pfft...what hoomins have bought this time?

Then on Friday is shopping day and of course and like any good kitty would do in my place I have to check all the shopping bags that hoomins bring home to make sure they’ve bought the right stuff and enough cat food and treats to last us, as hoomins and as everybody knows they can be forgetful at times. 
Keeping hoomins busy!
Then, we have the weekend, two days when hoomins become very lazy and they need constant reminder of their duties and which also means of course that I need to be more active as hoomins are around a lot (not doing much so I have to) and to also to get sufficient rest especially on Sundays so to charge myself for the coming week!

Sunday rest!
Pfeww! Thar was exhausting...As you can see I’m a very busy kitty and have to do a lot to keep an order in my home as hoomins can be a lot of work!

Anymeow that’s all for now...time for a little snack and snooze!

Purrs and meows till next time!

The wars of the blanket and the mystery of the underwear draw….

MY BLANKET…Tolkien cannot have it! Hallo hoomins and cats out there in the wide world outside. Another week has just passed and a few things...