Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien

Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien
The misadventures of Ozzy and Tolkien at home

Monday, 27 April 2020

Hoomins, squirrels, pigeons and even water drops...they all conspire against meowself...



Here I am trying to catch some of those pesky drops...they are as bad as hoomins and that pesky squirrel and pigeon outside and very wet too... 

So another month has just passed...apologies...really it has only been a week since my last blog entry but with the hoomins at home all the time it does feel like weeks not just days that have passed....and any cat like meowself that is would easily lose any sense of time, space, reality…when he has to spend so much time at home with the hoomins....so many things always seem to be going wrong which also makes everything else seems to be somehow out of synch!

Mornings they are now a complete and utter chaos of events...nobody knows when hoomins would get up or if they are going to get up at all anymore as both hoomins now doing the late shift it seems and they are staying very very late every night...well early morning actually which means that meowself and Tolkien annoyingly can not really have our late night play sessions anymore....well you can’t really run about in the house when hoomins are around of course and they also seem to totally ignoring you....I mean who ever heard of hoomin doing work at 2 in the morning and not even looking a bit tired or wanting to go to bed....One hoomin says that she gets more inspired at night and the other that he is not feeling really that tired so he might as well stay up and finish work....I mean this is not normal hoomin behaviour, is it now? 

I remember the good old days when hoomins use to go to bed not later than midnight because they had to get up early to go to work....which it used to work purrfect for everybody in the house, especially us, meowself and Tolkien as we then knew what time we should wake up the hoomins so we could have our breakfast....not anymore of course! Now that hoomins are going to bed wherever they feel like and they don’t have to go to work because they do work from home apparently so there is no time for breakfast for us...we have our breakfast almost the same time we have our lunch....unheard of (even if hoomins say that there is plenty of food for us as our food bowls are full…). Well hoomins that doesn’t count as morning breakfast but as late night snacking….so there! (You can read al about the good times we used to have at home before in the hoomin’s comic Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available on Amazon).



And of course in all this chaos and disorder that is now happening it’s not just the hoomins that they have become impossible to live with....You see it seems now that most of the hoomins are staying at home and they hardly seem to go outside the birdies and other small animals like pesky squirrels for example outside are becoming as bad as the hoomins inside; very very annoying....I mean you now have all these fat wood pigeons coming into the bird feeders and acting  like they are going into a public restaurant, not bothered or seem to get scarred of hoomins or even us...meowself and Tolkien...even when we try to scare them away. Tolkien and meowself were trying the entire morning to scare that fat pigeon of the bird feeder away with no success whatsoever...he was just staring at us....while kept pecking away like we were not there…unbelievable!

As for that pesky squirrel….he is the worst of them all as he is now coming not only to steal the birdies food but also to try to intimidates us as well. He just sits outside by the window and stares at us....it looks like he tries to scare us (and the hoomins too) off so we can let him nibble away in peace without distracting him....the nerve of that squirrel.
I’m telling you hoomins been at home all the time is not a good thing at all...Birds, squirrels and other creatures outside are becoming too brave and don’t seem to care about hoomins or cats being inside watching them anymore because they seem to know that they are quite safe outside now...

I’m telling your this is becoming a very stressful life for any cat like meowself to cope with and I think than I need to take some kind of holiday away from my hoomins and pesky squirrels and pigeons and Tolkien of course....I need to have some time to meowself where I can snooze and do some water drop catching in the sink in peace without being disturbed all the time by hoomins or Tolkien or that fat pigeon on the bird feeder who is also sooo noisy too trying to fit in that small bird feeder....well this is what happens when a fat bird eats too much it seems.

Now and talking about eating too much I don’t think that is the case with meowself anymore no matter what my hoomins are saying as now it seems that I do miss meals when hoomins are not awake so and therefore I do eat a lot less....and no I do not compensate later in the day by eating Tolkien’s or even the hoomin’s food... most definitely not. Although I must admit that those new biscuits hoomins recently got are very tasty....

Anymeows time to go now...feel rather pooped so I think it is time for some siesta...or beauty sleep.

Purrs and meows till next time!

Well and if you want to check that comic...Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien is now available on Amazon

There are also new range of products bases on our new comic Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available to buy ...The Comic Collection 

Also and if you feel generous and you want to help some of our senior cats with their vet bills so they can have a good old age you can do so by donating: So please click here

Don't forget to check my hoomin's site on Cat Behaviour if you want some advice...hoomin says that I am really good at giving good advice to hoomins! 





Monday, 20 April 2020

How to survive hoomins at home...the cat edition

Here I’m relaxing after a hard day at home with hoomins of course!
Well they have been now many many weeks since my hoomins and I’m also guessing many other hoomins out there since there seems to be hardly any hoomins to be seen outside that they’ve decided to copy us and become permanently indoors hoomins....and it feels a lot more than just a few weeks in reality....but that’s another story!

So after all these many weeks with hoomins hardly going outside other than short walks or what they call ‘emergency shopping’ I’ve decided that just hoping that one day things would go back to normal and my home would again become meow home (OK and Tolkien’s too...some of it anymeows) is not going to happen any time soon so it is better to just accept the fact that hoomins are here to stay ALL THE TIME and instead start behaving accordingly.
You know if you can’t beat them just annoy them as much as you can...after all hoomins are capable of tolerating anything would do....because they are gullible and I must admit stupidly caring hoomins.

So I’ve decided to stop getting annoyed with hoomins being at home all the time and instead to try and make the most of the current almost impossible situation we are all in….
You know doing things a bit differently like if they don’t want to get up in the morning then they is just fine by meowself and Tolkien…we simply change our daily routine as well so I then just sit on top of them and wait till they do get up....I’ll sit of course on both hoomins so they don’t feel neglected after all and I’d let Tolkien to do all the meowing and running around the house and playing with the bedroom curtains till hoomins of course get eventually the message that is ridiculously late and that is time for them to get up!

One of Tolkien’s  apparently relaxing position...sooo many legs hanging here!

Then and since of course they are at home all the time it is only natural for me to demand attention when I want attention which is usually when hoomins seem to be doing something they consider important like working in front of the computer or watching some interesting programme....there is always a good way to get their attention of course....either climbing on the desk and knock over things on the floor or have Tolkien doing his daily exercises by running and jumping on hoomins and in front of the telly when they do watch something...sometimes I’d join in the fun but most of the times Tolkien’s attempts are quite sufficient....Of course if this doesn’t work then I’d tell Tolkien to do some of his meowing....and he is very good at it....hoomins can’t simply ignore him no matter what they seem to be doing....he is sooo convincing and he still sounds like a kitten in distress...purrfect way every time to get hoomins’ attention (he is a not of course that intelligent or seems to understand why he needs to meow...Yeap he is a lot worse than he appears to be in the hoomin’s comic....Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available to download on Amazon).
Unfortunately I’m not very good with this meowing business but I can play the cute card instead by showing my belly and rolling around which also works very well with hoomins as they’d give me the attention I want if I need it of course....If I need some feeding climbing on the kitchen countertops works usually pretty well especially it they are working there too doing some cooking or baking...just walking up and down along with Tolkien works well and they soon get the message…Yeap my hoomins are very well trained…all my efforts all these years seem to have paid off after all!

So it seems that  things can work in our favour after all....having hoomins at home all the time can have some benefits....we just need to be persistent and not to let them ignore us when we want attention and feeding of course....and most importantly not to give up with their daily training now they are at home and keen to be trained and learn from us!

Purrs and meows till next time...hopefully I’d have trained my hoomins a bit more by then!

Well and if you want to check that comic...Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien is now available on Amazon

There are also new range of products bases on our new comic Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available to buy ...The Comic Collection

Also and if you feel generous and you want to help some of our senior cats with their vet bills so they can have a good old age you can do so by donating: So please click here.

Don't forget to check my hoomin's site on Cat Behaviour if you want some advice...hoomin says that I am really good at giving good advice to hoomins! 




Monday, 13 April 2020

My hoomins think they are cats....help!

This is  meowself showing the hoomins how to do some exercising...
You know every day I can’t help but wondering how long this torture would last....please can somebody out there tell me because I can’t take it anymore....I had just about enough with my hoomins...and Tolkien (he is a lot worse than I’ve told you about or he appears to be in the hoomin’s comic....Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available on Amazon of course). 

There have been many weeks with hoomins at home and many weekends too (and I must admit I have lost count now)...the last one supposedly it was what hoomins called the Easter weekend and there were supposed to be chocolate easter eggs and bunnies (there were none in my house by the way...hoomins don’t buy a lot of chocolate or bunnies it seems either) and things are not getting better…they are in fact getting worse…a lot worse…than last week’s worse!

You see something bad is happening with my permanently indoors now hoomins as it appears  that they are being changing....for the worse of course. You know, I think they have started using us, cats, as their new role models and it is not pretty...trust me on this!

My hoomins don’t seem to be doing a lot these day and they also like to sleep a lot...sometimes I think that they sleep a lot more than we do....especially in the mornings when they don’t seem to be getting up any particular time now so you don’t know when to expect breakfast anymore...(they shouldn’t be going to bed that late anymeows…their fault!).

They have become very lazy and they do spend a lot of time on the sofa pretending that they do what they call work....I’m sorry but when you are sitting for a very long time on the sofa you don’t work, you are resting, snoozing, napping, etc....I mean when we do spend a lot of time on the sofa we are being accused of being just lazy but that’s not true so if hoomins they call it working then we are working too....while resting on the sofa.
Tolkien here is showing the hoomins how to do proper snoozing....

Yes I don’t think that my hoomins are good at becoming cats....I think that they actually suck at it...They don’t even eat proper cat food like tuna or salmon for starters....well one of the hoomins is vegetarian apparently which means he doesn’t eat any meat or fish....I mean you can’t really be a cat if your don’t even eat chicken....although some of the hoomins food I do admit are not too bad....like the spaghetti they like to eat or ice cream or even those cheese and onion crisps they sometimes eat they are not that bad at all....I can see why Tolkien likes them so much now...hmmm!
Hoomins also like to cook their food....I mean you won’t hear about many cats who are cooking their food for kitty sake! Why can’t they just open a sachet with some nice tuna (or salmon) or if they are too hungry a big tin....it should be enough for both of them!

And don’t let me start about their new self-cleaning habits these days....I mean meowself and Tolkien have now started helping them to keep clean by doing some of the work for them....you know we do a bit of licking to help them stay clean as now they are not having everyday showers like they’ve used to do when they were used to go outside because they say that they don’t need to have as many showers now and they can also save on the water and electricity....Hmmm I’m not totally convinced about this that is the better solution and although I’m not saying that I think that my hoomins are smelly or something now but and just to be on the safe side you know meowself and Tolkien we don’t mind really giving them a hand to stay clean and scent free....what tongues are for anymeows?

Also meowself and Tolkien decided that our hoomins need a bit of extra exercise and things to do while they are staying home for so long and of course so they don’t get bored so we are ‘creating’ things for them to do like a few feet obstacles on the corridor by moving around the carpets a bit and a little bit of mess for them to clean up (for which Tolkien is totally responsible for as he is doing all the chewing of boxes and paper...I’ve tried meowself to do a bit of chewing but it is really hard work!). 

Anymeows better go now and check on those hoomins, we don’t want them to be left alone for too long and then they start feeling anxious because they can’t see me being around....you know how attached and clingy those hoomins can be!

Purrs and meows till next time

Well and if you want to check that comic...Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien is now available on Amazon

There is also now a new range of products based on our comic, Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available to buy at...The Comic Collection 

Also and if you feel generous and you want to help some of our senior cats with their vet bills so they can have a good old age you can do so by donating: So please click here:

Don't forget to check my hoomin's site on Cat Behaviour if you want some advice...hoomin says that I am really good at giving good advice to hoomins! 



Monday, 6 April 2020

Hoomins inside and squirrels outside....too much for a poor cat to cope with....


Some peace and snoozing time ...so rare these days with hoomins inside and squirrels outside!
Here we go again….as this is our third week with hoomins staying at home all the time and things are not getting any better....who would have thought that hoomins would prove so difficult to live with....they are actually impossible to live with....they have become too much for any cat to deal with! When this nightmare would ever end? Why hoomins have to stay at home all the time? WHY? WHY?
You see it’s not just the messed up routine and which I have mentioned it before that really is the problem....well it is a problem of course when hoomins are not acceptable to morning suggestions from our part so they can get up to serve up breakfast to two poor starving cats on time as well of course the also late going to bed routine which again interferes with our own late hours playtime schedule…but no, these are not the biggest current issues. Or it is the big change in our meal and treats routine as now hoomins seem to have become really sparse with the portions of our meals as they are keep saying how difficult is to get any food these days even cat food and we must not waste any food (who is wasting any food anymeows, not meowself of course)....or the fact that they don’t go out often now to do some normal shopping....I mean you’d thought that having more time now that they are at home all the time they would be going out more frequently to get some basic shopping like cat food, biscuits and treats....nope that’s not happening, quite the opposite instead…
Anymeows that change in the meal routine again is not the worst issue that we currently are having with the hoomins being at home all the time.

The worst of all is the hoomins behaviour....as they have become different hoomins from the hoomins I’ve used to know...Very annoying hoomins!
Tolkien and pesky squirrel are having a starring competition....guess who won? Not Tolkien
They have become very clingy and they feel the need to be affectionate constantly… and if by any chance they do step outside for a little while like going out to do some shopping or something similar they then acting when they are back like they are obsessed…like they haven’t seen us for hours....you know a cat can start feeling suffocated with all this extra attention and red lipstick mark on his neck....Come on hoomins stop overacting....
It seems to me that spending too much time indoors it had definitely a bad effect on hoomins and now after two weeks indoors they have started showing signs of separation anxiety...so they need to start spending sometime away from us if they are to get any better any time soon....please hoomins stay away from me for a few hours a day....it is for your own good! Keep some feline distance please! (The hoomin’s comic Life with Ozzy and Tolkien shows how good our life was before the hoomins invasion...available now to read on Amazon

Of course it’s not just the hoomins that they have become an issue recently. 
You see and since hoomins started putting birdseeds on the bird feeder outside that pesky squirrel is keeping coming back and gets into the bird feeder and eats all the seeds....meowself and Tolkien of course are trying our hardest to scare him off because he seems to like jumping into the bird feeder and to just sit there totally ignoring us and not even paying any attention to the hoomin either....He even sits on the window sill outside and just looks at us and mocks us because he knows we can’t really get him and to make things even worse he has now started bringing his pals as well....the wood pigeon and them two thieves work together to eat all the bird food. He jumps on the bird feeder and he drops seeds down below for the pigeon....those pesky stealing criminals....Something it needs to be done as Tolkien seems not to understand the concept of glass between him and the squirrel and he gets too excited and knocks everything on his path....hoomins not very happy....

Talking about Tolkien and how careless he can be I have to mention the little accident he had yesterday and which proved how careless he is and overestimates his jumping capabilities....trying to jump from the kitchen counter to the fridge with the hoomin in the middle along with the big bowl full of water for the fish tank....water all over the hoomin and on the floor and Tolkien took also a little bath when he ended up inside the bowl instead of the top of fridge....Well I could say that I felt sorry for him but I didn’t really as he got soaking wet and freaked out a bit but then the hoomin got wet too and the floor a lot more and hoomins had to spend a lot of time trying to dry the floor and Tolkien....but did Tolkien learnt his lesson? Of course not Tolkien is Tolkien and he never really learns anything....But he did learn one thing though....that hoomins can be a lot more affectionate and suffocating when you are being totally stupid and get yourself soaking wet....No sorry for Tolkien I’m afraid....he needs to learn that he can’t really fly!

Anymeows better go now....is getting late and hoomins unfortunately there are still up! Maybe at least would fill up our bowls!

Purrs and meows till next time!   

Well and if you want to check that comic...Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien is now available on Amazon

Also and if you feel generous and you want to help some of our senior cats with their vet bills so they can have a good old age you can do so by donating: So please click here

Don't forget to check my hoomin's site on Cat Behaviour if you want some advice...hoomin says that I am really good at giving good advice to hoomins! 




The battle with the squirrel outside has ended...the battle with the rest of his family has just started!

Yeap that pesky squirrel is totally ignoring me again! Well OK, maybe I’m exaggerating a little here as things perhaps are not as dramatic i...