Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien

Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien
The misadventures of Ozzy and Tolkien at home

Monday 13 April 2020

My hoomins think they are cats....help!

This is  meowself showing the hoomins how to do some exercising...
You know every day I can’t help but wondering how long this torture would last....please can somebody out there tell me because I can’t take it anymore....I had just about enough with my hoomins...and Tolkien (he is a lot worse than I’ve told you about or he appears to be in the hoomin’s comic....Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available on Amazon of course). 

There have been many weeks with hoomins at home and many weekends too (and I must admit I have lost count now)...the last one supposedly it was what hoomins called the Easter weekend and there were supposed to be chocolate easter eggs and bunnies (there were none in my house by the way...hoomins don’t buy a lot of chocolate or bunnies it seems either) and things are not getting better…they are in fact getting worse…a lot worse…than last week’s worse!

You see something bad is happening with my permanently indoors now hoomins as it appears  that they are being changing....for the worse of course. You know, I think they have started using us, cats, as their new role models and it is not pretty...trust me on this!

My hoomins don’t seem to be doing a lot these day and they also like to sleep a lot...sometimes I think that they sleep a lot more than we do....especially in the mornings when they don’t seem to be getting up any particular time now so you don’t know when to expect breakfast anymore...(they shouldn’t be going to bed that late anymeows…their fault!).

They have become very lazy and they do spend a lot of time on the sofa pretending that they do what they call work....I’m sorry but when you are sitting for a very long time on the sofa you don’t work, you are resting, snoozing, napping, etc....I mean when we do spend a lot of time on the sofa we are being accused of being just lazy but that’s not true so if hoomins they call it working then we are working too....while resting on the sofa.
Tolkien here is showing the hoomins how to do proper snoozing....

Yes I don’t think that my hoomins are good at becoming cats....I think that they actually suck at it...They don’t even eat proper cat food like tuna or salmon for starters....well one of the hoomins is vegetarian apparently which means he doesn’t eat any meat or fish....I mean you can’t really be a cat if your don’t even eat chicken....although some of the hoomins food I do admit are not too bad....like the spaghetti they like to eat or ice cream or even those cheese and onion crisps they sometimes eat they are not that bad at all....I can see why Tolkien likes them so much now...hmmm!
Hoomins also like to cook their food....I mean you won’t hear about many cats who are cooking their food for kitty sake! Why can’t they just open a sachet with some nice tuna (or salmon) or if they are too hungry a big tin....it should be enough for both of them!

And don’t let me start about their new self-cleaning habits these days....I mean meowself and Tolkien have now started helping them to keep clean by doing some of the work for them....you know we do a bit of licking to help them stay clean as now they are not having everyday showers like they’ve used to do when they were used to go outside because they say that they don’t need to have as many showers now and they can also save on the water and electricity....Hmmm I’m not totally convinced about this that is the better solution and although I’m not saying that I think that my hoomins are smelly or something now but and just to be on the safe side you know meowself and Tolkien we don’t mind really giving them a hand to stay clean and scent free....what tongues are for anymeows?

Also meowself and Tolkien decided that our hoomins need a bit of extra exercise and things to do while they are staying home for so long and of course so they don’t get bored so we are ‘creating’ things for them to do like a few feet obstacles on the corridor by moving around the carpets a bit and a little bit of mess for them to clean up (for which Tolkien is totally responsible for as he is doing all the chewing of boxes and paper...I’ve tried meowself to do a bit of chewing but it is really hard work!). 

Anymeows better go now and check on those hoomins, we don’t want them to be left alone for too long and then they start feeling anxious because they can’t see me being around....you know how attached and clingy those hoomins can be!

Purrs and meows till next time

Well and if you want to check that comic...Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien is now available on Amazon

There is also now a new range of products based on our comic, Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available to buy at...The Comic Collection 

Also and if you feel generous and you want to help some of our senior cats with their vet bills so they can have a good old age you can do so by donating: So please click here:

Don't forget to check my hoomin's site on Cat Behaviour if you want some advice...hoomin says that I am really good at giving good advice to hoomins! 



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