Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien

Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien
The misadventures of Ozzy and Tolkien at home

Monday 31 August 2020

There is no such thing as Ozzy the bully....hoomins are telling lies!

See? I fit purrfectly on my hammock...too small for Tolkien!

You know once upon a time there was a happy cat who was living with his two hoomins and a kitten who had no brains....they all were living together and they were very happy....but one day and rather suddenly things changed. The hoomins decided to become cats themselves so they’ve stayed at home all the time and they became very lazy and inconsiderate when it came down to how they were treating their very cute cat....as they’ve started accusing him of things that he was not responsible for....

 And now I guess I can breathe again. Yes it is true my hoomins have started accusing me for things I’m not responsible for....as I’m a very considerate and caring cat after all and don’t try or even think of harming anyone (even that pesky squirrel and fat pigeons outside….they can be sooo annoying sometimes though!).

I mean I’m not or have ever been a bully in my entire life....I might like to motivate the hoomins and guide Tolkien in some occasions so they do the right thing but I don’t bully.....I mean you only have to look on my cute face to see and then convince yourself that I’m not a bully....I’m too cute to be a mean cat!

 (You can still read about our life at home and of course all about the good times we’ve used to have at home in the good old days before March when hoomins behaved like hoomins and they’ve used to go outside often...in the hoomins comic Life with Ozzy.. and Tolkien available on Amazon).


Of course I do admit that Tolkien is very stoopid and often would try your patience with his stoopidity but I don’t bully him....even when he is very very annoying!


You see the whole thing started again last week after the arrival of this new scratching post which meowself and Tolkien really like and we very quickly learned to share....I’ve taken the hammock because it is the right size for my purrfect self and I’ve left the top spot, ‘the bed’ for Tolkien as it was big enough to fit his long ears, tail and legs (although he still manages to hang his feet and tail and even to fall off in a couple of occasions....because he is clumsy and too big and he likes hanging.....strange cat indeed!). So we are both quite happy sharing the new scratching post with no issues...

Tolkien with his big paws and tail can’t fit anywhere...

But now hoomins rather suddenly and unexpectedly are accusing meowself of trying to steal Tolkien’s top stop which of course is not true as I was only trying it out for him so to make  sure that is quite comfy for him and also the right size so he won’t fall off (which of course he did as he is very clumsy and he falls off from everything even the bed and sofa, chairs, etc, etc... Well.... really there is no hope for him). So I wasn’t really trying to steal Tolkien’s spot for him I was only trying to make sure that it is safe enough for him by having a little snooze up there meowself.....besides I prefer meowself the hammock below which is a lot more comfy and safe....the top spot is after all a bit too high for meowself anymeows.


But hoomins of course misinterpreted my actions and thought that I was trying to steal Tolkien’s spot and that I was also bullying Tolkien especially when we are playing and that I was pulling out his fur on purpose as well.....which of course is totally nonsenses....We are only playing and Tokien simply likes making silly noises and pretending that I’m playing too rough just to get the hoomins’ attention and get me into trouble too! I can also assure you that he is the one that makes all that mess with the carpets as well as he is very clumsy when he runs and he even pulls his own fur in some occasions so that it looks that I’m bullying him....I’ve seen him doing it! He likes getting a lot of attention from the hoomins because he thinks that he is still a kitten and to blame meowself for all his ‘unhappy accidents’ in the house as he is sooo clumsy and stoopid of course!


So there… I’m not a bully....I don’t bully Tolkien or the hoomins so to give me attention or food....and I do not try to steal the hoomin’s food....just tasting it occasionally so to make sure that is safe enough for her to eat!


Yes I’m very caring and considerate and kind and hoomins and Tolkien do not seem to appreciate meowself at all....despite all my good efforts.

Anymeows better go now to check on hoomins and Tolkien of course before he destroys the house again....oh no! He is on the top of the bedroom door once again! Now where are those pesky hoomins when you want them?


Purrs and meows till next time!


Before you go and if you want to check that mentioned above comic...Life with Ozzy and.. Tolkien is now available to download or buy on Amazon


Ozzy and Tolkien would like to ask you to donate if you could so to help us with the ever expensive vet bills of our senior cats so they can have a good old age.  So please PayPal Ozzy and Tolkien’s hoomin. Thank you!


Don't forget to check my hoomin's site on Cat Behaviour if you want some advice...hoomin says that I am really good at giving good advice to hoomins! 




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