Monday, 29 July 2019

Purrsonality Meltdown - my hoomins are calling it...don’t think so!

Not a hamster...just checking these green and orange stuff...yak!


You know, I’ve always maintained that I’m a normal cat...well, I consider meowself to be a normal cat…I look like one and I act like one....but somehow my hoomins seem to have a different opinion for their bizarre reasons of course!
They even say that I have split purrsonality and that I suffer from purrsonality meltdown (one of my hoomins was saying to the other hoomin the other day that my upbringing as a kitten and previous experiences might have something to do this...pfft, I say as she seems to consider herself to be some kind of expert on cat behaviour or something similar and she thinks she understands us, cats....very unlikely story I say that any hoomin really understands or knows anything about cat behaviour,  hee, hee...so funny they can be those hoomins sometimes)!

So you see, first they started by accusing me of acting like a kitten and not like a cat of my age... (what is age anyway? Another hoomin meaningless invention)....being too playful and as they call it rather mischievous but of course they were only exaggerating and misunderstood me as always...As I am only using some of that excess energy by doing a bit of exercising and some as it would have been expected normal cat investigating, nothing unusual here, just doing what a normal cat would do under similar circumstances...

Then they were also started accusing me of not behaving like a cat but instead acting like a small dog, a puppy they call it  simply because I like following my hoomins around the house all the time so to keep an eye on them of course, as well as waiting for them at the door when they come home in the evening (isn’t that what all good cats suppose to do anyway when hoomins are coming home??? Very normal!) and even they say that I growl and make noises like a dog and I don’t know how to meow or hiss like a cat....well, hoomins I don’t like hissing because it is soooo below me, such an uncivilised behaviour, getting angry and star hissing like a snake....a behaviour that any respectable cat these days would try to avoid as there is no real reason to be angry and show aggressive behaviour, us, cats are so so much better now than we used to be when we used to live on our own. We have learned to be social and polite towards other cats and hoomins…even towards dogs! As for meowing, well again not all cats meow or to explain it better there is no real need to meow anymore as we simply use different sounds to communicate with our hoomins and which sounds our hoomins seem to understand as well lot better than …meowing!
As for communicating with each other...well again no sounds needed, we understand each other without the need to vocalise, we have developed what you hoomins called ‘telepathy’ but it is a catepathy as only cats understand it and know how to use it...we are in process of course of trying to  teach our hoomins the same method but as hoomins aren’t that intelligent they still have a long way to go to reach our level and a lot of work is still needed....but we are getting there!

Now and back to my hoomins and to the latest chapter of this saga of purrsonalities issues I’m now and once again being accused of being something else…This time I’m hamster simply because my hoomins caught me yesterday sitting in the small cat’s home (who for some strange reason hoomins are calling hamster...and they think that is a small creature that I should have some grudge against for some reason...so peculiar....these hoomins and their logic again!!). You see and because I was only checking the little cat’s or hamster’s (to please those hoomins) home to see if it is safe to sit and sleep there and also because they think that they saw me eating his food as well  (as I have seen him eating all that stuff constantly so I was kinda curious to see how that peculiar looking and smelling stuff tasted and of course whether it was safe to eat) my hoomins now they say that I’m turning to a hamster....Which of course it is totally and utterly absurd...how is it possible a big cat like me to change to a small creature like that hamster and start eating all these seeds and vegetables...not very likely, really!

So, hoomins, chill! I’m still a cat, nothing has changed...I’m not turning to a dog or hamster or even a hoomin (good grief…what a thought) even if I like playing with my bone occasionally or seem to like sitting on the hamster’s home and even nibbling on some of his food....It’s all part of being a cat that has many responsibilities in his domain...Everything is under control...I’m in charge of everything and everybody as always..so don’t worry about me and my purrsonalities!

So now hoomins I think is about time for my dinner...I fancy some chicken...you can keep the bones of course...
Purrs and meows till next time fellow cats out there!

But before I go I would like to mention here again that my hoomins trying to raise money to help with our older cats vet bills as their treatments can be very expensive since insurances don’t cover senior cats treatment for life (not fair really as we can live a lot longer now and some of us need medical treatment)...so if you feel generous and you want to help you can donate by clicking here:

Also now I have my own range of products Ozzy Superstar which you can buy from here:


No comments:

Post a Comment

Well, the end has come....and gone and hoomins have adopted a new kitten!!!

Yes hoomins...I know what you are up to...you don’t fool me! So and if you remember from last week I was telling you about my pesky hoom...